I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
