Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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