it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
