Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
