that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize