Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Randomize
