Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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