Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
