is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
