Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Randomize
