Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize
