i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
