and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Dick very happy bro
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize