glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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