yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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