my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize