Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
