My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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