I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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