What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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