Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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