Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
