she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
