two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize