do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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