You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
