oh fat girl friday strikes again...
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
