Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
another moral hangover. fuck.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize