I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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