Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
