Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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