so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize