I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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