fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
