And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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