16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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