Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
