I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I'm both gender and math confused
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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