i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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