so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
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