it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
