Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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