pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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