Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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