If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
