she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Just high enough for therapy.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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