I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Fuck appropriateness.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize