Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
