My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
He uses pillows to masturbate.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
