Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Princesses don't give blow jobs
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
