i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
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