I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize